Dear Diary
by puckasaurusgleek
Summary: Rachel Berry begins a diary her first day of her sophomore year. Her life changes through a series of mistakes and relationships. Terrible summary lol... SMUCKLEBERRY!
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys! This is a random idea I had so hopefully I'll keep it going lol… It's set back of course to the beginning of Sophomore year. I'm going to use a lot of the performance ideas and such that happened through that season but for the most part it will be pretty different! Hope ya'll enjoy! I love the feedback so keep it coming! And I do not own Glee **

August 18th, 2010 –

Dear Diary,

People might be surprised to know that this is my very first diary. I never found the time for it when I was growing up (too many singing lessons and dance classes); but I've decided that if I'm going to be a huge star, there will need to be a recorded history of my life in order to write my memoirs. So here it is, first day of my sophomore year of high school… I wore my favorite black skirt (it's shorter than most so I notice all of the wonderfully scandalous stares I get), a pink tank top and a black cardigan with pink flamingos down the front. Some people call my style a mix between a grandma and five year old (Kurt Hummel) but I think it speaks to the true complexities of my life. Brittney Spears said it perfectly… I'm not a child, not yet a woman. So there you have it. Back to the subject of school today… Everything was wonderful at first. I found out that Mr. Rierson had officially been fired from McKinley High (do not mess with me and my talent), so I immediately signed up for my starring role in Glee Club. Then I went about my day, shining like the star I am. But of course, in the land of Berry, nothing ever goes smoothly for very long. Just after lunch, as I was walking towards my Math class, Noah Puckerman slushied me (I'm using actual names because I want them to feel embarrassed when they read my memoir). That inconsiderate Neanderthal even had the nerve to wink at me! Wink at me! Why must we inspired upstanding representations of bright futures and fame be tormented by people who will never make it out of this state! The worst part of this all is that Noah and I had some kind of a relationship this summer. I knew things would go back to their old ways but I never really knew how much it would hurt…

[JCC was held in Lima this year and they broke us up into age groups… this was different from previous years where they would split us up by gender. Of course, Lima is a relatively small town and the amount of Jews is even smaller… not to mention the amount of 16 year old Jews – there were 3 of us; me, Noah, and Jacob Ben-Israel. By the end of the first week, Noah had to save me a record of five times from being molested by Jacob. By that Saturday Jacob was sent home with a concussion and a giant black eye with 'no memory' of how he got it. This left Noah and I a ton of alone time… and we may have made the best of it. Okay, this is a diary and not my ACTUAL memoirs so I'm going to spill all of the juicy details. Noah told me he found me to be pretty cool and actually thought I was pretty the day they sent Jacob home. By Tuesday of that week we found ourselves attached at the lips throughout the majority of the day. I have to say, despite his image at school, he is a really sweet, caring person, and an amazing kisser! So yeah, we made out A LOT. By Thursday we had begun some uhm… heavy petting (if my dads find this I'm never going to be allowed out of my room). His fingers were calloused from playing the guitar and I swear it triggered every nerve ending in my body; add his slightly rough but still smooth pouty lips on my collarbone and I was just a melting pot of teen sexual depravity. We continued with this until the last day of camp (Friday, today is Monday… three days ago ;) ].

'_M-more Noah,' Rachel moaned as he ran his fingers under her skirt and over her damp panties. He growled in her ear as he felt her push her hips to meet his hand._

'_What do you want me to do Rachel?' he asked sexily in a gruff whisper._

'_I w-want you to… to…' she wasn't able to complete the thought as he began to rub circles over her clothed nerve ending._

'_To what?' _

'_To… oh please just do it Noah! Anything! Please…' she begged as he began to move his thumb in faster circles over the sensitive spot. _

'_I'm not going to do anything if you don't tell me what you want.' He demanded as he slightly pinched her clit causing her back to arch off the bed._

'_Fuck! Fuck me please…' she begged as she could feel herself nearing climax. _

'_Would you like it if I used my mouth first?' he whispered against her neck causing her to become even more aroused._

'_Yes… mouth… please' she moaned. She suddenly felt his fingers leave her and thought she could die from the intense need to reach sexual satisfaction. When she thought she wouldn't be able to take it anymore, his mouth was suddenly there. She felt his tongue slide up her slit then without warning he was sucking on her clit. She nearly burst into tears with the intense pleasure of what he was doing. She knew it was only a matter of minutes before she would cum harder than she ever dreamed possible. She began to buck her hips towards his face, trying to get as close to him as possible._

'_You can't come until I tell you to Rachel.' He said suddenly. She nodded her head but was too far gone for anymore response than that. _

'_N-Noah please…please… I n-need to… please' she begged after a few more minutes of his mouth working its sexual magic. She was so close it was becoming almost painful. She needed to cum, if she didn't she swore she would die. The intensity just kept building and building; and when she didn't think it would get any more pleasurable, he would add a new sensation. When he slowly slid two fingers into her body she really didn't think she could take it, but suddenly not only were they there and moving, but he was curling his fingers slightly, running them over her G-Spot. She began to make sounds that she didn't know she could make, loud, animalistic, almost un-ladylike sounds. When tears literally filled her eyes he finally gave her what she wanted._

'_Cum.' That one word and all that intensity that was filling her up, suddenly exploded into a blinding orgasm; he kept moving his fingers as she fell apart around him. Her mouth shaped into a silent scream as she dug her nails into his back. Her body contorted in an arch against him, shaking as she came harder than he'd ever seen before. _

'_N-Noah… fuck… Noah!' she finally yelled as her orgasm heightened slightly with another stroke over her G-spot. When she finally came down she felt completely weightless; her whole body practically numb with the high amounts of endorphins that had just coursed through her veins. _

'_Did that feel good Rachel?' he asked as he kissed a line across her jaw and down her neck. She still couldn't respond. 'Because you haven't felt anything yet… that was just the appetizer.' Her eyes shot open and she turned to face him._

'_W-what? That was an appetizer?' she asked in a husky voice that even surprised her._

'_I'll let you get your sea legs back, don't worry. But then I'm going to show you what it should really feel like.' He whispered the last against her ear and she couldn't help the moan that escaped her lips. He grinned at her response but kept to his promise. He waited a few more minutes for her breathing to steady and her body to quit jerking before he began 'the main course'. _

_He ran his hand slowly down her body, reveling in the shutter he felt pass over her. _

'_We don't have to do this if you don't want to Rach.' He said as he slowly began moving his hand over her still sensitive mound._

'_Don't stop Noah' she said breathlessly. He grinned at her readiness and settled himself between her legs. Before he could grab the condom on the dresser he felt her hand curl around his throbbing member (seeing her come undone had done wonders for his erection). His eyes clenched as she began to stroke it gently with her amazingly soft hands. _

'_Does that feel good Noah?' she asked lazily in a joking fashion._

'_Fuck… yeah.' He grunted as her other hand began to play with his sensitive balls. _

'_What would feel even better?' she asked in a sultry voice causing him to growl and direct himself to her awaiting opening. She gasped as he began to inch his way in, slowly and carefully; knowing it was going to hurt her at first. When he finally broke the barrier he stopped again and waited until he felt her start to move against him. He kissed away the lone tear that had fallen and began to move slowly in and out until he felt her eagerness. _

'_You're so… big… so good.' She moaned as he began to pick up his pace._

'_Do you want it to feel good or really really good?' he asked as he bit down on her neck and soothed it with his tongue._

'_Really really good… oh please Noah… h-harder.' She said pulling his body as close to hers as she could. He pulled out completely causing her to whimper and quickly flipped her to her side and entered her from behind. _

'_Oh fuck Noah!' she yelled as she felt him fill her again, this time every inch of her seemed to react to the position. He held her legs closed as he pounded as hard and fast as he could knowing that the pressure of the angle and her closed legs would cause even more pleasure._

'_Does it feel good baby?' he grunted._

'_So good Noah… please… don't stop.' He could feel her walls clenching around his member and knew she was getting close. He reached around and began rubbing her sensitive clit with a quick pace. She began grabbing at the sheets and pillows trying to hold on to anything she could as her body prepared for another intense orgasm. When he felt her finally fall over the edge he bit down hard on the spot where her neck met her shoulders causing her to practically shriek with pleasure._

'_Fuck! I'm… I'm com—' she began to say but couldn't finish as the orgasm racked through her body. After a few more strokes he fell apart with her, both of them clawing at each other to find some sort of solidity as their bodies felt pure pleasure. They both collapsed after what had seemed to be the longest orgasm Puck had ever felt. Neither could say a word as they tried to regain their basic motor skills._

So yeah, I lost my virginity to Noah Puckerman on Friday. He was so different those few weeks at camp and even on Friday after he took my home, we just cuddled on my couch watching movies until he had to leave to watch his sister. He promised me that he would be better this year. Its only day one and he's already broken that promise. I just wish I could stop thinking about him and the way he made me feel; emotionally and sexually. It's almost like I need him; which I'll be honest, scares the hell out of me. So that was my day… tomorrow should be interesting; first day of our new Glee club!


	2. Chapter 2

**This one is substantially shorter but I promise over the long run they will all equal out! Hope you guys are enjoying this! Again, I do not own Glee…**

August 19th 2010

Dear Diary,

Today was a very interesting day… have you ever heard the quote 'your Knight in shining armor is just a retard wrapped in tin foil?' Of course you haven't, you are a diary. Anyway, apparently my knight is just that. See, I was walking in the cafeteria today and two things happened simultaneously, well three actually. Anyway, Karofsky and his goons decided that I would be their target today so I ended up getting three trays of food dumped down my new purple bunny sweater, then Jacob ran up and began rubbing the food into my clothes. He said it was payback for camp but he was also getting more boob action than I've ever given anyone (besides Noah) before. Before I could react Jacob was on the floor bleeding from the nose. In walks my retard in tin foil… Noah. He punched him so hard I couldn't tell what was spaghetti sauce and what was blood. So then he proceeds to wipe some of the sauce off my face with his thumb and licked it clean… so cute and sorta romantic, but then Karofsky (standing right beside us still holding his tray) decided that he needed to make a caveman comment as usual – 'Did you just lick spaghetti sauce that you wiped off that freaks face?' and Noah being Noah well, being Puck said, 'No, I licked it from Berry's face, the freak is still standing here looking like an idiot with a tray in his hand.' It was so sweet of him, but of course Karofsky doesn't stand for any of that so an all out war broke out. So now Noah, Karofsky, Jacob, and I are all suspended for a week! I've never even been tardy for class and now I'm SUSPENDED! Luckily my dads are out of town for about four weeks so I'll have the house to myself… but still, Noah tried to save the day and ended up getting us all suspended… retard in tin foil. I did sneak into Glee though. It's a really pathetic group of individuals and we really need some help. I'm thinking about asking Noah to join (he sings at JCC and is really good) but he would never go for it. Right now there are only five of us in our Glee club… Artie, Tina, Kurt, Mercedes and I. Each one of us is really different and I don't know how in the world we're going to pull this off. Artie can't dance (in a wheelchair) but has a great voice and would really do well with contemporary R&B songs. Tina stutters and is Gothic but she has a decent voice… with a little training she could be amazing. Kurt is gay but in the closet, he sings like a girl so it adds a unique dimension to our group of strays. Mercedes is a DIVA and that's coming from me. She thinks that she has the best voice in the group but that's clearly not the case with me there. It's going to be a rough year and I don't know if it's even worth it.

So back to Puckerman… I think I'm really falling for him which really scares me. We keep catching each other staring at one another during class (English 3rd period, Art 5th and Biology 7th) and it gives me the chills every time. I keep zoning out thinking about all of the amazing things he can do with his hands and his mouth and… and yeah… it's distracting. I really want to do all of those things again with him. I even want to date him… but I'm just a loser at McKinley and he's the cool jock. There's no way he would go for it. He slushied me yesterday for goodness sakes! But then again, he did say today that I wasn't a freak and put a hefty mark on his permanent record for my honor. Maybe I should call him… I'm sure he doesn't have anything better to do for the week…


End file.
